As a little girl, I was very timid I could only express or be myself around my close friends which were quit a few. I didn’t like my body because I felt others didn’t like it, part of the reasons was because I was the only one among my peers that had developed breast and had pimples at the time. This made me felt really sad and inferior, each time I walked on the streets alone, I felt the whole street was staring at me wondering what kind of an alien I was…I practically lived in the world of fantasy wishing I could do this or that without actually trying them in reality.
Part of the reason I didn’t try out things I love so much like writing especially when it has to do with what the public might see or hear is because I am afraid of REJECTION. Apart from procrastination, rejection was another reason it took me so long to upload my first post, every time I look at the piece all I could see were errors, reasons why it is just not perfect enough to appear in public so I let it go.
When I got into college, I thought the inferiority complex had dropped but it was obvious I thought wrong. There were so many things I wanted to do in my year one, two and three in both church and school that I couldn’t do, my friends thought it was procrastination or laziness(they were not far from the truth anyway) but deep down I knew it was because I was afraid of rejection, the mere thought of it gives me cold feet so no matter the encouragement I had gotten from friends and books, nothing seems to work. I usually hide in the crowd where no one could see me but I’d see them all. That’s why in most social gathering I find myself I know more than 50% of the people while in return only a few can barely remember my face. I prayed about it but nothing changed, I became so angry with myself because there was so much on my plate that I wanted to dish out to people but rejection was holding me back, at some point I felt I wasn’t good enough or didn’t even know what I want at all..
One day, when I was studying I began to fantasies about my life and all the things I needed to do as usual, then a question popped into my head “what if you miss your time? That scared the hell out of me because even the bible says there is time for everything-Eccl. Then I asked myself what if this really is my time and I’m being ignorant about it, for the first time I thought deeply about what Jack said when he told me
“Wendy no one can be a better cheerleader of you than YOU”.
I realised that I have been waiting for almost everyone to believe in me, to cheer me, to never give up on me but it is high time I woke up and faced reality.
That was it! Those were the words that set everything else in place those words inspired me for real to pick my pen and write again, this time, not focusing on being rejected because that will definitely come but on the lives that will be inspired or saved by my actions or my piece, lives like mine that fear rejection and are suffering from the pain of hiding their potentials, people that gives a damn so much about others opinion, those that don’t like their bodies. Reaching out to these people became my priority and rejection? a necessary evil.
Rejection doesn’t make you weak or break you, it brings out all the strength and stamina you’ve got in you. We shouldn’t be afraid of it rather, we should anticipate it because it is like the catalyst that elevates us, it is a pathway to celebration therefore, you can not be celebrated if you were not first rejected(a typical example of our lord Jesus).
A cheerleader encourages others whether they are winning or losing. You can imagine when you become your own cheerleader both in thick and thin, rainy or sunny, you never give up on you despite all glaring reasons to, when your friends can’t see the possibilities in achieving your goals, when you are stuck in the dark tunnel and you think you can’t see the light you should be the one telling you to “go Wendy! go Wendy! go Wendy! And you just might see the light. That way, if the world rejects you, you are certain you have a cheerleader in you. One that won’t ever reject you and you will work so hard to prove to that person that her hope and prayers were not in vein.
P.S your cheerleader is YOU and mine is ME…..